Hey Friend!

I’m currently experiencing a lull in business productivity. I haven’t been on social media much over the past few weeks, and I haven’t been creating much content.

Instead, I’ve been reading books, visiting with friends, going on day-dates with my husband, and taking long walks. I’m not going to lie, it’s been hard at times to enjoy this downtime, I often feel the sharp pangs of urgency, restlessness, and guilt that I’m not doing what I’m supposed to be doing.

This isn’t surprising to me. We live in a society that sees productivity, as a measurement of worth, success and goodness.

But, is being unproductive really even possible? I mean, after all, we are always doing something. Even sitting down doing nothing is doing something, right? So, why is that labeled good or bad/right or wrong? And, really, isn’t a person’s doing ultimately a personal thing, unique to each of us?

It’s up to each of us to decide then, whether binge watching TV on the couch is a restorative act of self-love or an act of self-sabotage.

Consider also, who’s voice is in your head when you are taking some downtime? According to whose rules or standards are you judging the success of your life? Are your actions derived from a place of rejuvenation, joy, alignment and growth or are your actions a form of avoidance, keeping you from the life you desire? How do you know for sure?

Marlee Grace’s book, Getting to Center, offers relatable and easy to follow advice for incorporating ease and aligned work into your life. Here are two of her valuable insights:

NOTICE HOW “DISTRACTIONS” SHOW UP
While Grace’s book will never shame anyone for watching mindless or “trashy” TV, as she recognizes that “distractions often serve to protect our overworked minds,” she does argue that, “we must stay committed to the daily maintenance of our lives off the screen to share our findings at a slow and non-urgent pace…to stay in rather than drop out.”

In order to determine whether your action is actually avoidance, ask your self these questions:

-Is there some big other commitment to self I said I would do today that I am avoiding?

-Am I using this distraction because I don’t want to face myself?

-Is this distraction a pivot moment where I get to relax and find pleasure before returning to my work?

Depending on the answer, the “distraction” might actually be a nourishing time for you to recharge or an opportunity for you to overcome the distraction (instead of reaching for your phone to scroll social media, call a friend, go for a walk outside or do some journaling instead to break the cycle of avoidance).

TAKE THE GUILT OUT OF GUILTY PLEASURES
Consider giving yourself full permission to just experience pleasure. Grace writes, “Rejuvenation for me is just about paying attention to my own rhythms, bodily and mentally. When I am going too fast or too slow. Listening to my body and mind in terms of what it needs…to rejuvenate is to say what is and to say what isn’t and to not hate myself on the journey of finding it all out.”

Here are some ways to rejuvenate:
-Sauna
-Bath
-Go be alone somewhere
-Take a trip and not work for 3 days
-Go be with other people somewhere
-Pray (follow Anne Lamott’s 3 prayer ideas from Help, Thanks, Wow, pray to ask for help, be grateful or be in awe)
-Go outside
-Be intimate with a partner or yourself
-Create art
-Do nothing

Getting to Center isn’t anti-productivity, but it’s a way to consciously manage work and ease into our lives without guilt or shame. Instead of telling people to find balance, Grace prefers to say get “back on the beam.” She writes, “We will always get knocked off, and we may get knocked off when we least expect it. You might picture the beam where gymnasts do amazing tricks. They flip and spin through the air, and then, with a mix of luck and skill, they stick the landing in their sparkly leotards and throw their hands up…I’ve built tools into my life to help me get back on the beam faster…And if we don’t stick the landing and instead break both ankles and crumple into a ball, we’re going to figure out how the hell to start over again.”

I’ve been focusing my self-hypnosis practice on extricating my worth from my doing and focusing on what makes me feel calm and most alive. I’m going to make this the focus of our upcoming Group Hypnosis recordings. If you’d like to be added to the list to receive this and any additional free monthly hypnosis recordings, click here or comment below saying “add me to the list.”

I hope you find the tools to help you honor your cycles of productivity, combat shame or anxiety when you need rest, and bust through avoidance to face what needs facing. And, through any ups and downs, may you “get back on the beam” stronger and more energized than ever!

Happy editing,
Robin

Hey Friend!

I talk a lot with clients and friends about busyness and burnout, because they tend to go hand in hand. And, I’ve found that because, culturally, we tend to judge a person’s success and value based on what they “do,” it goes without saying that we overbook and overexert ourselves in a mad rush to constantly try to measure up, to be good enough, and to be worthy.

Best-selling author of Do Less, Kate Northrup, writes, “It’s recently come to my attention that I have a habit of, or perhaps even an addiction to, proving my worth through constant activity…

How many meaningful conversations in the car with my husband have I not had because I was checking my email for the twentieth time that day?…

How many breaths have become shallow from being caught in the spin of constant activity?…

How many precious moments of stillness have I missed because I feared what might come up during the pause?”

Northrup offers the following list as signs you might be addicted to busyness:
– As much as you crave white space on your calendar it also gives you anxiety.

– You notice yourself checking your phone obsessively throughout the day, particularly when you are tired, overwhelmed, or anxious.

– More than once, a close friend or family member has said something about your compulsion to engage with your phone or computer and how it affects your relationship.

– When someone suggests that you relax and do nothing, you say to yourself or out loud, “What the heck does that even mean? What do people do when they do nothing?”

– When you do find yourself doing nothing, you feel guilty that you aren’t being productive.

– You mentally tally the number of productive hours you’ve had at the end of the day and judge how you feel about yourself by how full your day was.

– You find yourself “complaining” about how busy you are while simultaneously feeling proud of having so much on your plate that you can barely breathe.

– You say that you’re too busy to meditate, move your body, nap, hang out with your girlfriends, make love, prepare healthy food for yourself, or go on dates (with yourself, your spouse, or new people).

In our busyness, we’ve subconsciously created behavior patterns and habits that make our busyness feel “normal,” while making downtime and rest feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar–hence, we resist it. Only by creating new habits and behavior patterns can we break free from the pull and overwhelm of busyness.

5 New Habits/Practices to Help You Slow Down, Use Your Time Effectively and Feel More in Control of Your Day
1. Schedule at least one engaging and fun activity that you can do every single day. Put it on your To Do list and treat it as a priority. This way, attending to your needs and desires, no matter how small, becomes part of your daily routine. Also, this communicates to your subconscious that your needs/wants/desires matter. To help with this, take this affirmation through your daily hypnosis practice: I make space for what matters most.

2. Don’t over-commitment to social engagements. Time with friends and family is important, but when you spread yourself too thin, these engagements begin to feel taxing and draining. Learning to say no, without guilt or shame, will help to create healthy boundaries for restoration and downtime, keeping your social events about connection rather than obligation and/or resentment. To help with this, take this affirmation through your daily hypnosis practice: I am at my best when I am rested and recharged. It is safe for me to take a break.

3. Create more space in your day by learning to work more efficiently. Perhaps, you can batch calls and meetings so that you’re not switching gears all day long or you can make tasks easier to complete by getting a handle on your perfectionism. Brené Brown recently posted this quote, “Perfectionism, the 20-ton shield we lug around hoping it protects us from experiencing judgement, shame and blame, when all it really does is keep us from being seen, and it’s heavy AF.” It’s important that we know our limits and allow ourselves to complete and let go. To help with this, take this affirmation through your daily hypnosis practice: Being is just as valuable as doing. Downtime is valuable time.

4. Wake up naturally on your own, without an alarm, as often as possible. To help with this, take this affirmation through your daily hypnosis practice: My creativity is fueled by rest.

5. Start or end the day with a 10 minute hypnosis recording:

Along with helping to reprogram your subconscious mind, this practice will also help manage stress and deepen your breathing. It’s important to our health (mind, body and soul) to quiet our mind. A hypnosis practice will keep you grounded, relaxed and motivated. Consider this hypno-affirmation for your practice: Doing less allows me to have more of what matters in my life.

I hope you find the time to practice doing less of what overwhelms you and more of what brings you joy, presence, connection and peace. Remember, working with the subconscious will help you stay aligned with what really matters to you in your life–helping you stay more aware of patterns that deplete your energy.

Change takes time, but showing up as your most aligned and rejuvenated self deserves a spot on your calendar!

Happy editing,
Robin